It's all about etiquette...

The following topic has been at the back of my mind for quite some time now, and it seems that it has become so much of an annoyance that I can't stand the thought of having to answer the phone...

Firstly I would like to point out that when YOU call someone, don't be rude!! I didn't ask you to call me and I don't make the rules so keep your rudeness to yourself. 

Let me explain: "(insert restaurants name here) good day, how can I help you?" "Hi, this is Mr. Asshole, I want to make a booking for tonight." "Ofcourse sir, where would you like to si..." "I want one of the booths" "OK sir I'll see what I can do as most of them have already been booked." (Keep in mind that this is only 2 hours before the special starts, so getting a reservation is good luck all on its own. "*in an aggravated voice* I want a booth because my wife is 8 months pregnant and will NOT sit on a normal chair.." "Yes sir, I'll see what I can do." Dead goes the line and I need to rotate the 15 other bookings I had to accommodate Mr. Asshole and his pregnant wife. Now I have seen how fat people and pregnant woman have tried to squeeze into the booths just to ask for a regular table as it is more comfortable. Bur hey, what do I know? I've only been doing this for 7 years...

Then we get the ones who were too late for a booking, these are all people who knows the owner personally and will not hesitate to call him and tell him how useless you are for not getting extra tables and chairs out of thin air... To you people I would like to remove the 70 inch stick from your ass and beat you with it till you understand what a huge asshole you're being.

The wrong numbers... Ok some of them are funny but when you get mad at me because you can't put 10 digits successfully into your phone and call the right number, please don't mind me slamming the phone down in your ear. Also, and this might come as a surprise to you, pressing re-dail won't get you to the correct number, that's right little monkey you'll end up with me again. Oh and no I don't have every business' telephone number at the ready so I won't be able to give it to you...

When calling someone, please stop the conversation you're having with the other person because when I answer the phone and have to wait for 3 minutes so you can stop what you're talking about I will no longer be friendly because you're wasting my time! Then try to have the conversation you want to have in order so that I don't have to wait every 2 minutes so that you can figure out exactly what it is that you want to say! 

Then you get those people that are barely literate. Speaking in very slow sentences and making sure that one simple sentence only takes them 5 minutes!! I don't even have the patience to wait for a burger, what makes you think I'll have it with you? If you can't speak, get someone who can and put that guy on the phone!! 

Now we get to the suppliers, oh how I love *puke puke* placing orders. Especially by those who have no clue what products they sell, what it sounds like or where to find them on their system... I have, on more than one occasion, stopped the call idiot, I mean operator, and asked for someone who knows what they're doing! How hard can it be to take a simple order. I don't have a speech impediment, I don't speak too soft, the line is not bad and I know how to pronounce the products seeing as I work with them everyday. So why is it necessary for ME to explain YOUR products to you? 

I could literally go on for weeks here about how people just don't have any more manners or etiquette but the subject gets a little bit boring as more people deal with this than we would care to know about. 

Today I'm leaving you with a little though to keep:

IF YOU HAVE NEVER ENCOUNTERED SOMEONE LIKE THIS, YOU ARE THAT PERSON...

The war inside...

As I'm looking at my already half eaten plate of chicken wings with deep-fried potatoes, the little war in my head starts up again and I decide to put it on "paper" and share with you what it means to be lost in the world of being obsessed with your weight and the way you look...

As many people who knows me know, I DO NOT make my dislike for overweight people a secret. It's unhealthy, it's ugly and too many people blame it on things that need not be a catalyst to eat too much junk food and exercise being nowhere near their prospective to-do list. I'm not judgmental as most overweight people I've come across think I am. I am in no way making fun of them and it has never made sense to me why it would hurt your feelings telling you what you look like.. Telling me I've got buckle knees, small boobs and (this is the worst) "only a dog eats bones" is in no way nice to hear but I don't cry about it and I most certainly don't cut my wrists about it! Wanna know why? Because I know it's true, I know being too skinny isn't pretty, I know that people's opinions shouldn't matter so I let it roll over me like water over a duck's back.

YES, I do know I should keep quiet, but if I know you and care for you I want you to be in my life for as long as possible, and adding fat around your heart isn't going to help with this. I KNOW I'm being mean, but being nice didn't work so this is probably my last resort.

But enough about you, let's get back to me...

I come from a family (my dad's side) who have, in my opinion, great genes. We are skinny, good looking (besides our huge noses), smart and talented. (I have made peace with my flaws and accept all the great gifts God has given me, before I get stoned for being vain). But then there's my mother's side who's mostly overweight, not too bright, a bit common and mostly no manners. (Not all of them of course, but most). So this places me in a very awkward see-saw of not gaining weight and gaining weight. I have never been fat!! I have been tall and skinny my entire life, being 1.79 m and weighing in at 55 kg when I was 18, I was envied by many and hated by the rest. I was a very active child and teenager and started working when I was 15. I didn't go out of my way to exercise and ate anything and everything I wanted too. While my friends were dieting for the matric farewell to fit into dresses measured 4 months prior, I had to somehow gain the weight I had somehow lost. Life was great right?? Skinny people never gets criticized!! Right? WRONG!! Fat people does NOT get half the criticism we do, you gain 2 kg, no problem, but I gain 2 kg and parties are thrown cause "the bitch is finally getting what she deserves" and suddenly my fat ass is all the rage.

Since school I've gained about 11 kg's and I've been out of school for almost 5 years now. When people look at me and I tell them this little fun fact they can't believe it because surely I must've looked anorexic. But no I didn't I looked like a normal skinny person, I do agree that I look better with a little more curves. Working in a restaurant, though, is very bad for your thighs, ass, love handles and your talking belly fat. I started to go to the gym so that I won't look like my mother and her family...

I am very health conscious and I take my appearance seriously. You won't find me in town with pajamas and dirty hair. When I'm out and about chances are I've done my makeup and straightened my hair. I have atleast 8 mirror checks before leaving the house and if I'm not 100% happy, I change. And I don't do this because I want or need anyone's approval, I do it cause if I don't feel good about the way I look, you do not want to be near me. I do it because I know how I look at people that just doesn't give a damn. I do it because I don't want to be THAT girl who crawls out of bed and goes somewhere and then judge everyone who decided to up their game that day because you are jealous and a slob.

I have used very unhealthy ways to lose weight and I'm not proud to say this but it still made me feel good. I loved being able not to eat for days and seeing my bones stick out. Then I read a book about anorexia and a lot of things fell into place for me. Anorexia isn't as easy to get rid of as being fat. It's a state of being. And you don't have to be skin and bones to have the disease. It's more about the thoughts you have when looking at yourself, when eating, when trying on new clothes, when every day life becomes disrupted because you hate the way your weight makes you feel. You can weigh 90 kg and still have an anorexic mindset. For the last 8 months I've been stopping these thoughts deliberately and trying to focus om being healthy and fit instead of skinny. I still take tremendous care to not gain any weight and since I forced myself to be healthy I am happier, have more energy and I accept myself more than when I lost 7 kg in a month and a half cause my mother told me I've gotten curves. (In my head she said I almost look like her from all the weight I gained) See your words hurt us and as I don't do anything moderately I go to extreme lengths to make myself feel "better".

I happen to love salads and I don't really like oily foods anymore so it's relatively easy for me to keep my weight in check, but I get my off days where wearing something I looked great in last week just doesn't seem to look right will drive me to tears or put me in a horrible mood. So you grabbing at my love handles (which are not that big) don't feel surprised when I stab you in the neck with the first object I can find. 

Guys and girls, I know a lot of you can relate, I know it's a tough world out there. I know that living with this constant war inside yourself when putting anything in your mouth can drive you insane and leave you with a lot of resentment for yourself. But stop hurting your body because your mind is unstable. Be honest with yourself and work on the "inner-you". Fix the problem from the inside out.

It's not easy being you when you hate yourself and in my little time on earth I had to learn this the hard way and have scars to prove it.













Stay gorgeous and positive!

Gym nightmares

I used to HATE people talking about going to the gym, well I hated anyone who brought up exercise in any form. Because I am lazy! I don't want to hear about you amazing workout because I probably had an amazing cocktail in front of me with a double burger, spicy wings and a large portion of chips. 

I AM A GLUTON!!

I love food more than I love life!! And then something amazing happened.. I fell in love with healthy food.. Broccoli, cauliflower, carrots, peas, zucchini, you name it, I loved it and obviously still do. I'll have a burger any day of the week, as long as the patty is freshly made with lean mince, fresh toppings and chips fried in no trans-fat oils. It's healthier, it's tastier and 70% of the time it's bigger!

 Working my ridiculous hours, a balanced diet is a MUST, and let's face it, greasy food takes the will to be productive like the Taxman takes our hard earned money! But, alas, this new habit wasn't enough, I had to get a hobby to get my mind off the stress of having to deal with irresponsible, idiotic staff and egotistical asshole customers day in and day out. So my boss suggested I go to the gym, I do hope it's not because of the "African ass" (as my one waiter likes to point out) that started to take over my jeans... :/ Nevertheless I joined the local gym and slowly (oh so very slowly) started liking it. Then I started LOVING it! My whole week was planned around my gym time and if I couldn't go for more than 4 days you had a VERY grumpy manager that could scare the living hell out of a lion. (Seriously)Now I buy more gym clothes than anything else in my closet and Friday night drinking was soon forgotten cause I had to get up on a Saturday to do 2 hours of intense cardio and weight training.


But living in a town full of students that are always following the latest trend, which in this case is to go to the gym, means that the gym is often over crowded and you seem to wait forever to get a turn on any of the machines...(Well except the ones made to work your legs, hehe) Now I have NO problem waiting for equipment when the person/s using them are actually training. But the kids that are in the gym to... We'll get to that.



My pet peeves in the gym (yes I actually will go home without working out because of these things):

1. There is about a million people in the gym, everyone is working on their chest, back, shoulders and abs (note how no-one is doing legs) which means most of the equipment is preoccupied. And here you have Mr. I'm-still-trying-to-go-heavy-but-I'm-not-actually-strong-enough and he wants to do a hundred sets of 2, resting for 5min every time! These one's makes me want to hurl the whole machine at them! (Unfortunately I'm not strong enough (see I can realize this)) STOP WASTING MY TIME and go lift some of the 2kg dumbbells, dumbass!




2. The one's who come to look at themselves rather than to actually work out. Get your tiny legs to the leg press and leave your pathetic arms alone! Assface



3. The bouncing bunnies (especially dislike those) the girls that's hopping around in the weight section WITHOUT a jumping rope and trying oh so hard to get Mr. I'm-too-sexy-to-do-legs' attention. Hop along little bunny before someone gets hurt, and by someone I mean YOU!







4. If you sweat more than an obese guy in the KFC line at mid-summer, WIPE DOWN THE FREAKIN EQUIPMENT! Goodness how is this NOT common sense??

5. The socializing group. Ok, great you have a whole team to workout with, but please workout all the other muscles besides your tongue! I do NOT want to hear about what who the F*%^$ ever Sandy is did and I especially don't want to hear it while waiting for a spot to do some real exercises.

6. The changing rooms are only that big, would you mind putting one of your 4 gigantic bags on the floor so that we (the rest of the paying clientele) can also use the benches to change or fill water or whatever the hell we want... Selfish much!

7. Don't throw the weights around you moron! If you can't put it down properly you might want to consider using a lighter one.

8. Please wear clothes that fit!! I do NOT need to see your g-string that can barely contain your love-handles THROUGH black tights that was meant for the weight you're still aspiring to be!!! Buying bigger has no shame, walking around like a tied up marshmallow is!





9. Don't come and have conversations with me!! I'm not being rude when I ONLY give you a brief "Hello" or "Goodbye" but I'm trying to stay focused... some of those legs and arms can be real distracting you know ;)

And finally nr 10!
DON'T GIVE OTHER PEOPLE NASTY LOOKS!! The guys are getting worse than the girl! You know what bouncing bunny, that big girl you're laughing at is atleast starting to solve her problem! She might even never be as skinny as you but at least she's not a shallow little s*&% who can't keep her gym tights on long enough to get the guys name! YOU make me sick and one day I am going to stand up for that big girl that I don't even know and then I do hope you can think and run as fast as you can get a guy in your pants.


PHEEWWWW that feels better.

Thanks for another fine ranting session!

See you soon my fellow word lovers...

Welcome to the dark side....

Welcome to the dark side, they've got freaks over here...

So, here I am, going to work 28 days of the month, minding my own business, going to the gym and keeping to myself. Nice, boring little life I have created for myself and sometimes I just want some excitement! A challenge, maybe even some romance...

BE CAREFUL WHAT YOU WISH FOR!!

Working in hospitality is a tough job, you get up, put on your happy face, smile to all the ignorant and often arrogant customers and wish them stomach pains as soon as they turn their backs. This is fun, for a while at least, and then your life gets mundane again and all you really want to do is go out, meet some new people and have some fun! The problem isn't really meeting new people, I do that every single day, the problem is getting to choose who you meet:

Example numero uno:

*(1) new message* : 'Hi (spell my name wrong), I think I drove past you today, you look great! Would love to get to know you better' - UUHHHH WHO THE HELL ARE YOU?? AND HOW THE F...CK DID YOU GET MY NAME TO FACEBOOK ME?? Seriously guys, it's NOT okay to do this!! Now, every guy that looks at me seems like a weird stalker who somehow found out who I was, what's next? Show up at my house with some or other lame excuse? No thanks, delete, block and change my hair!!

Example TWO:
*random message on Whatsapp from an unknown nr* "Hi" me: "who's this?" random person: "oh, I saw you in the restaurant today and you seemed really nice so 'insert ex's name' gave me your nr.." me"I'm not a nice person so please ask that #&^@ to lose my number and do the same".. Cold? Maybe, but imagine every guy that THINKS I'm nice when they see me in my working place gets his hands on my number! And what makes it worse is that my dickhead ex knows how much I hate people handing out my number and, probably to piss me off, he goes and gives it to his fat friend! (Maybe I'm still a little pissed...) OF COURSE I'm friendly when I'm at work, it's my JOB!! I'm the manager for Pete's sake, it doesn't mean I'm trying to score dates!!


*Sigh* The Third one:
Mr. Stalker! I have encountered a few of these men during my 7 years in the hospitality industry. I've had the loud and noisy one's who announce that they absolutely adore you (keep in mind they know nothing about you except for your name), the one's who quietly sits at the bar/table and just stares at you, whilst talking under his breath (the scarier type) and then you get the love-sick one's! The guys who saw you and immediately decided that you are the one they wanted to be with. When you approach their table (normally they'll come in a group and will frequent your restaurant) and ask if they enjoyed their evening, this person might try to stumble out something like "Yes" and then continue to stare at you longingly as you leave the table, not at all aware that I can see he is doing this. They don't even know your name, as they don't have the courage to ask you and will always instigate the group to stay longer in the hope that they might find some courage at the end of a VERY tall drink!

Today I ran into number 3! I've known for quite some time that he likes me (this makes perfect sense as he has never spoken one word to me) and when he comes here he'll avoid eye contact and look at me when he thinks I'm not looking. But today was different, he came here with a girl! I was pleased, maybe he could leave me alone now. He goes for a smoke and she calls me over, asks me for my number cause her FRIEND really likes me...GREAT it's the good old wingman stunt! I politely decline as I don't want to upset my customers and leave it at that. They pay their bill and I feel relieved. The girl leaves and here is Mr. Stalker, ordering another beer and coming to sit outside where I'm talking to some friends. 2 hours later he's still sitting there, pouring liquid courage down his throat and waiting for a reason to talk to me, and then he gets a light bulb moment and asks his waiter to call the manager.
We have a very awkward conversation followed by a waiter calling me for a fake kitchen emergency and I'm almost free of getting asked out on a date... I do hope he got the picture after I declined 3 times!
I do not and will not ever understand why people do this! Like me? Cool, introduce yourself! Want my number? How about asking me yourself! Ask me out on a date? Please not after work as I've already been working for 9 hours and still had 6 to go!

I applaud your courage gentleman and stalkers alike! You make life interesting and sometimes fun! But there are boundaries which you need to respect! You can't get my number off of another person and just start texting me, you can't come to my work and make it impossible for me to not feel awkward and you CAN NOT find me on FB and start harassing me!

Enough adventure and drama for one day, it's time to get back to work and face my demons!

Ciao


   

Attention please...

*SIGH* Attention whores, don't you just hate them?

All of us knows at least two of them, very nice and oh so charming but just shut the f*** up already!! Social media has made these people a thousand times worse, a billion times more annoying and a trillion times too up in my face. I'm gonna break it down for those who don't know any (you probably are that person):





1. The "omg it's like so annoying how everybody just likes me on *insert social media site* I just wish everyone would leave me alone" -GET OVER YOURSELF!
2. The "please stop inboxing me you freaks, I don't even know you!" updates. - Uhhhh WHY did you accept them if you don't know them???
3. The "here's my bbm pin and watsapp nr"- Seriously sweetheart, if people wanted to add you they would've done so the first hundred times you posted it!
4. The "My parents are such assholes for not buying me the newest of EVERYTHING!" - seriously, just kill yourself.
5. The "I hate my life so much, everything is so horrible and nobody even loves me *comment to make me feel better*" - The only constant in that was YOU!!
6. The "Stop judging everyone, we are all humans and have flaws and are beautiful in our own imperfect perfection" Oh really? says you who judges everything and everyone by justifying yourself with BS explanations. (I hate these the most)
7. The "I'm so ugly" posts 700000000 selfies and half naked pics.

The list goes on but I think I've made my point. Can I really be the only one that have invisible arguments with these people whenever reading their annoying updates on FB? The solution: UNFRIEND that mofo!

But, alas, attention whores are like cockroaches: kill one and a million more follows suit. It's an unrelenting vicious cycle of seeking attention and not being satisfied with the little bit you do get.

There has to be some kind of psychological reason behind all of this, the need to be loved or hated by absolutely everyone, even the people you don't know. To be wanted, to mean something. This is all what the human psyche is about but some people need it in overdose and in a world where it's all or nothing these's individuals who crave acceptance from each and every person they come across. And this is who I call attention whores, they will sell their body and soul to get someone's approval, no matter who that person is or in what capacity it is received.



They taunt us day after day, dragging us down their rabbit hole and forcing us to become part of their sick game. Making us believe that the attention we're getting on a daily basis is not enough. We need to up our game and be more relentless towards these creatures or stand the risk of becoming one.

May the day never come where I feel the need to become and Attention Whore!!

4 day weekends

Ah the popular 4 day weekends, those weekends everyone looks forward to. Holidays get planned, families get extra visits and the birds and bees are happy to be alive! The world is such a joyful place with a 4 day weekend...

Except of course if you're working in the restaurant business, the 4 day weekends means extra hours, harder work and little to no sleep! THIS is the weekends I thrive on, those that gets the heart beating and weakens you at the knees (most certainly not because of feelings of love). No public holidays to increase your pay BTW, oh no just filling in for your colleague, working 18 hours extra on top of the 88 hours you were gonna work anyways before getting one night to recover before running this crazy cycle again...

How do I do it? I put on my big girl panties, make up my face and convince myself that I am still young and even though my eyes look like I've just smoked a bag of weed, I AM NOT TIRED!!

NOT!!!! TIRED!!!! NOT!!!! TIRED!!!! NO!!!! TIIIIRED!! N!!! T-I-R-E-D!!

As hard as it is, I still do it day after day, week after week and thank my stars that I have a job that I love which pays for my off weekends and a place I get to see for about 3 hours a day. The job that will hopefully turn into a career and take me to places I've only dreamed about! This is why I do it! To eat great food EVERY day, meet new and exciting people every day, seeing the joy on a customers face when they once again take a bite of the perfect steak, telling a kid that his picture is the best I've ever seen and getting the occasional pat on the back for doing what I do best.

Fun times right? Not always, doing a 9am till 1am shift 3 days in a row with another 8 hour shift to go gets a little bit harder when you have a sprained ankle, a wine festival with 10 extra tables and a group of waiters not nearly as experienced as they should be and a hour long list about what can and will go wrong then pasting on the permanent fake smile! "No sir, of course I take no offence in the way your yelling at me because you and your wife have been fighting since you got here and SHE got you order wrong, please let me make it all better by standing on my head while taming a wild lion and giving your little brat, I mean adorable child, yet another milkshake that he can spill everywhere." "No, no, it really is such a pleasure and don't even worry about my self esteem... And please keep your change, it seems you need it more than I do!" Don't you just love your inside voice?

Now it's Monday, the phone won't stop ringing, the "But why are you tired, it was just weekend." questions come in non-stop and I still need to count the stock and finish the new menu items...

Maybe being a stripper isn't that bad of an idea after all....

mornings...

Mornings... Mornings are Satan's way of getting back at us for hating him! Why anyone would want to get up at 6am to do things is beyond me! 

The only reason you will ever find me awake at 5 or 6 in the morning is when I haven't been to sleep yet, and this is where my line of work comes in perfectly...

I am a manager in a restaurant and only have to be at work at 9am, which probably seems late to everyone else but I feel a day only starts at 12pm! Some people, however, does not care that I get to sleep late and insists on calling me before even the Early Bird has woken to catch any worms. NO, I do not wish to insure my life with your scamming company,NO I do not need to know my horoscope before I've even known what day it is and NO I do not speak all 11 official languages so I highly doubt your looking for me...

Pet peeve numero uno: Calling or messaging me awake or just waking me up for no good reason..

 Good reasons to wake me up: 

1. Someone close to me has died. (Has happened way too much)

2. The house I'm sleeping in is burning down. (I'll care bout your house burning as soon as I wake up,by myself)

3. Someone is trying to break into the house I'm sleeping in. (Still don't particularly careabout yours)

4. 

Nope that's it, only 3 reasons to wake me up,and telling me how your day is going isn't one of them. If you are considering to call me for any other reason I hope you accepted some life insurance from the annoying scammer or at least have a good funeral plan! (I like nice food at funerals you  know).

But now that I am up and the sun is shining I am going to make the best of it and make some peoples lives better by serving the best damn food in this town!!

Ciao.

PS: Just cause I'm up,doesn't mean I'm awake! (This is why I don't drive)

It's me...

Human beings, the only species that can't stop talking about growing up, moving out and living it up in the big fabulous world,just to turn around and bitch about the responsibilities,the challenges and not getting ahead fast enough... Slow down! Take a break,breath and appreciate all the hustle and bustle you so looked forward to while eating the sarmies your mom packed you in pre-school.

Hah! Easier said than done in a world where food, cars, music and trends are moving at the speed of light, not stopping for anything or anyone, while the Earth,this gorgeous planet is deteriorating without ever being seen. Lovely landscaped lawns and pedicured beaches, huts in the forest to get closer to your "inner earth child" and scampering up Mountains to get a glimpse of breathtaking beauty... This is luxury, and we're working our asses off to get to enjoy it!

Hi, I'm Nasha-Leigh Brouwer and this is my first blog,where I will share my days, my sorrows, my funnies and my pet peeves. No bullshit and no sugar coating! Food,wine and good people is what I'm all about and seeing the beauty of things you might miss...

I talk to myself A LOT!! I'm the best conversation I get some days, and I will share all my crazy thoughtswith you! Right now I'm having a little fight with myself,never should have eaten the calamari deep fried and I should have had water instead of ice tea...boohoo little angle but the devil of all things fatty will always win! And who's to say I should give up glorious food for a tighter stomach? Who gives a shit anyways,it's my life and if I have to go out I'll probably go with a glass of wine in the one hand and a piece of steak in the other...mmm steak...

Well, duty calls..
Laters!!